Musings of a travelling Chef

Holy crap I remembered my password

2009-03-31T02:14:00.001-05:00

w00t! No longer am I locked out of my own blogger account.

I've volunteered to be a Youth Leader now

2007-09-13T01:12:00.000-05:00

And I feel so out of the loop. Today we were making a list of the kids who might come on our big kickoff trip. And all the other leaders could name like 10 kids each. Right off the top of their heads. I sat there....mute. It was all I could do just to remember the list of names, let alone try and put faces to them. I felt so insignificant kinda.

I'm really worried about how much of an impact I'll be able to have on this Youth. I see people like Nathan, Kim, Beau, Mitch, and Meredith; these people just blow me away with the passion I see in them.

I have a pretty good idea what my gifts are in this world. I'm not a natural leader like Nate is. I don't have this deep spiritual relationship with God like Kim. I couldn't even hope to ever have as much love and joy in my heart as Beau does, his body matches his heart. I don't even think I'm fit to be compared to these people whom I have so much respect for. No, those aren't my areas of specialty. Even the things other people probably think I'm good at, I don't think I'm very good at. It's rare for me to be satisfied with something I've done. There's always a way I could have done it better, faster, easier. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night, scenarios of missed opportunities playing over and over again in my head. Things I've done wrong, or just not done at all. They haunt me, specters I can't shake.

I can easily see myself falling into the role of the guy who works behind the scenes. Coasting through, being helpful, but not having any real impact on anybody. I don't want to be that guy.

I measure my success by how many people would attend my funeral if I died tomorrow.
I try to make sure that number grows every year. It’s a theoretical number... But it’s the best measurement I can think of.
-Unknown

One of the best articles I've ever read.

2007-09-09T19:19:00.000-05:00

The Best Article I've Ever Read

Jobs, Cars, and Money

2007-09-01T22:22:00.000-05:00

My life has seemed to revolve around these three things lately. I can't escape them. Not that I necessarily want to. I just couldn't if I wanted to.

The Job

I was recently asked by someone I respect and love very much, if I would work for them in opening a restaurant they had just taken over. At first, it was just as a support position in the kitchen. Then, when their first option backed out. They asked me to be the Head Chef. At first, I was excited and reluctant. I've never been in charge before. I've always had someone far more experienced looking over my shoulder. I wouldn't necessarily rely on this person, but they were there to catch me before I slipped and fell over the edge. I was excited because I finally WOULD be in charge. It would be my food going out to the customer. My kitchen to organize and maintain, my name going up in flames or down in history depending on my performance. I'm going to be able to do what I want and expect from myself. Not what another expects. Good or bad. I'd be in control.

I spent a lot of time in the kitchen, working for another persons standards first, mine second. Sometimes that meant I had to compromise. Produce food that in one way shape or form, was not my food. (Not often, I was lucky to work with very skilled people) But every once in a while. It just wouldn't be something I was proud of. Now, it's all me, if I'm not proud of it. I don't serve it.

The Car

I recently purchased a 1984 Chevrolet Cavalier Type 10. A beautiful older car. Not one you see very often out on the roads, and never in the condition this one was. When I bought it, it ran fine, it needed a few tinkerings, but driveable. When I brought it home, I was forced to let it sit for a couple weeks before I could afford insurance. I tried to take care of it as it sat, running it every once in a while, checking fluids, even washing it once (something I've never done with my own car)

The first day I have it insured and am driving it. It dies, 10 minutes from my house. So we get it towed home, and find out it needs a new fuel pump. Ok, not a huge deal, 100$....tops. Go to Lordco and they tell us to put in this new pump. We do, only to find out once it's in that it's not the right kind of pump. It's putting out twice the fuel pressure I need. So we go back, get that all resolved and finally put in the right fuel pump. With tons of help from a good friend, Phil.

So I take it for another test drive. 5 minutes from my house, it stalls. I manage to get it started again, but every time I let it idle, it stalls. So we get it home and Phil takes a look. That last fuel pump has damaged the carburetor. There is a slow leak of fuel into it that the engine can't handle when it idles. So the engine floods. It's not ideal. I can still drive it, just can't let it idle at lights and such. Not a big problem. Just annoying. After a couple of days of driving I notice that the front right is clunking.

So we put the car up on blocks AGAIN, take a look underneath, and notice that the drivers side front CV joint boot is all torn up, and dirt and crud is piling up in my CV joint. Now my car needs a new CV joint. That's another 120$ So while we have it up on blocks, Phil decides he's going to rebuild the carburetor. Takes it out, takes a look. Phil says to me " Your carburetor is fubared." It's worn out in places it shouldn't be worn out. I need to replace it. So now my car has no carburetor...at all. A rebuilt one from Lordco is 500$. That's a little steep, so Phil looks around, says he can get me one for about 350$.

Now lets track how much I've spent on this car so far.
Bought it
1400$
Various licenses.
127$
3 months insurance
450$
New Fuel pump
112$
New CV Joint
127$
New radiator (not necessary, but an upgrade)
47$
and now, I need a new (rebuilt) carburetor
300$ (at least)

Add that all up. You get about 2500$

I'll 2500$ on a car that I've driven for total...about a week.

Money

After Culinary school, I was about 5000$ in debt, all things considered. While I was in the states, I kinda saved my money, didn't do much. It was difficult to pay debts all the way across the continent. I made minimum payments. But in the meantime. I saved.

When I got home, I bought the car, bought my parents a new T.V. Then kinda just hung out a bit for a while. Trying to make a decision on whether or not I still wanted to pursue a career in cooking. Then the phone calls started. Mostly my one credit card. It's my own fault. I should've stayed on top of it. They've demanded the entire balance now. It's paid off. But that brings me back down to pocket change to spend. Guess I won't be able to get that carburetor for a bit, even if we can find one.

Other
I've decided I don't like sitting around the house on my computer all the time. I'm trying to find things that can eat up that spare time I've got now. I'm gonna try working out on a regular basis now. If that doesn't work out, I'll try Judo with James, my brother. Either way, that'll kill some time as well as getting me in better shape.

I've also volunteered to be a Youth Leader for my church. Although I'm not doing that to kill time. I really want to help them out. I could've started earlier, but I made the mistake of putting my career first. Now I won't have to make that decision. I have an employer who is going to understand that commitment, and work with me to make sure all parties involved are happy.

I'm really looking forward to this new job. I just wish I could get into the kitchen sooner. I don't like being excessively rushed. I like having time to prepare things. But such is the nature of the beast. I'll do my best. If this restaurant does go down (and theres a good chance it will, odds are against all restaurant openings) It won't be because I didn't do the best I could.

I'm lost now

2007-07-25T22:17:00.000-05:00

Ever since the beginning of my senior year in highschool, I've known exactly what I wanted to do with my life. I wanted to be a chef, I wanted to be a really good chef and travel the world, seeing new things and meeting people. Ever since then I've chased after that goal with everything I have.

The last 6 weeks has changed all that. I no longer know what my goals in life are, whether I should be working, or relaxing, or even if I should be here at home.

For some reason, my boss at the Hyatt in Chesapeake Bay decided he didn't like me, or that I wasn't fit for the position I was in. He set out to find any and every excuse he could to see that I was disciplined for each and every minor infraction I incurred. And there were some. I'm not going to say I'm a perfect employee, I often bite off more than I can chew, and miss details that shouldn't be missed. But it was only from a deep-rooted fear of being normal that chased me to reach for those things I couldn't reach.

The chef got what he wanted, I made mistakes, he punished me for them, to the maximum extent he could. And I lost my job. Whatever his motives and methods, whether they were iron-fisted or not, it still lost me my job. At first, I attempted to look around for a new place to work under the conditions of my work visa, all I needed was someone willing to sponsor me for the remainder of my 18 months. (about 5 months by then)

I was fired Thursday, I found out monday night that a close friend of mine, Tasha Barry. Had died. She was hit by a train while trying to take a photograph. Pronounced brain dead, kept alive for 2 days in hope they could harvest her organs, then allowed to pass on Monday.

At that point, I gave up, I wrapped up what loose ends I could in Maryland. Said goodbye to the friends I had made, and came home.

So now, I don't know what to do. I don't know if I want to return to the business that ate up a year of my life, and kept me from the people (person)that I truly care about. Then tossed me out when it had decided I wasn't the right sort of person for it. I don't want to sit at home all my life, freeloading off of my parents and being a drain. I don't want to work at a meaningless job I don't care about for pennies. I certainly don't want to work for a big corporation that sees me more as a figure on a piece of paper than as a person.

So what do I do?

I miss her, I miss her every single day.

A lot has happened lately

2007-07-15T03:38:00.001-05:00

but I'm not ready to reflect on it just yet. It's too painful, give me some time.

Rest in Peace Tasha

2007-06-27T01:06:00.001-05:00

Have you ever met somebody who had the ability to make everyone they met fall completely in love with them? I have, her name was Tasha. She was, and always will be, the most genuine and wise soul I have ever known. Everybody who came in contact with her stepped away with a smile on their face and a joy in their souls they had never known before. You may think I exaggerate, but I worry my words are not strong enough to convince you.

Although I knew Tasha for only a relatively short time. For a piece of that time, I had the extreme privilege of being as important to her, as she was to everyone who knew her. That is something I will never forget. Whether or not I was, or ever will be, worthy of that....I don't know. I don't think I was. Tasha may have thought so, but that's part of what made her so amazing.

To Tasha, every person, every moment, was precious and worthy of all her energies and love. I cannot think of a better example of someone who put their heart and soul and love into everything they did, than Tasha.

It's not right, it's not fair. Nobody deserves this, least of all her. I wouldn't be alone in saying that were I given the choice of her life or mine....hers would take precedence.

The world has lost something it already had far too little of.

Oh my what a busy time I've had

2007-06-03T08:16:00.000-05:00

I have not had a chance to just sit back and relax since Wednesday. Let me tell you what I've been up to the last couple of days.

Wednesday
Rented a car and went out to ocean city. Tried to get the convertible but couldn't because you have to be 25. Spent half my day at Ocean City then finally came home at around 8 or 9. Bought a Nintendo DS and passed out.

Thursday
4 Hour drive to Busch Gardens Europe to ride the rollercoasters. Especially, the Griffon. 205 foot drop at a 90 degree angle. It is the most intense rollercoaster I've ever been on. The buildup is just incredible. Sitting in the front seat, close to the end of the row. There's no track underneath you, theres no floor. And you're dangling right at the top of the drop for about 5 seconds (although it feels longer) before they drop you, then it's a loopdeloop, spin, a SECOND drop, half the size, then another loopdeloop, spin, and you're back at the beginning. Whole thing takes about 45 seconds.

Friday
It's just me and our new exec sous Charles at work today. Banged out our work, only took 11 hours. Good day all in all. (Charles came with me to Busch Gardens by the way) It's cool when you can go out with your boss and hang out and have a good time. Charles is a good chef, and I can learn a lot from him. But at the end of the day when I'm not on the clock. He's just Charles, and I can talk and joke with him. He's not afraid that he's gonna say the wrong thing and get taken to the Human Resources department. He's just himself. It's awesome when you have a boss like that.

Saturday.
Starting right at 12:01 am. Start celebrating my birthday. Hanging out at my neighbours house, playing a little beer pong. Listening to Tim talk about his days as a line cook. Fall asleep around 4am. Go to work at 10. Another 11 hour day. We plated up almost 500 plates in about an hour. For a hot food plate-up. That's not bad. Not the best, but not bad. I was runner, so I was responsible for making sure every station had what it needed to plate up. Cooking spinach, potatoes, fish, broccolini, whatever it takes. Gotta be quick on your feet. It wasn't a perfect night, was late on 1 or 2 things. But did pretty good I thought. I'll do better once I get some practice at it. Get home, get ready for my birthday party that same night. Round 11 o'clock, 11:30, people start showing up. Mostly interns, cuz they're always down for a party. Then by 12, I'm drunk, people are still making me drink alchohol. I then proceeded to get the sickest I've ever been in my life. I remember mostly a few people taking care of me. Making sure I didn't drown. With a little bit of "oh gosh I think I'm gonna die" thrown in there. It's pretty safe to say I'm not drinking again for a little while.

Now it's Sunday, and since it's the Sabbath. I'm going to rest. The most important thing I have to take care of today is sending Joel some birthday money for his Wii.

Oh yeah, got paid Friday. 52 MORE CENTS AND IT WOULD HAVE BEEN 1000$ Oh well, it was gross over 1400$ I can deal with that. All the working and not doing anything is starting to pay off. I've got some money saved up that isn't going to go to bills. The odds of me getting a vacation are pretty slim. But if I go home I'll just get homesick anyways. I think I'm just gonna try to put my head down, work through this summer, then hold on the last few months till November when I get to finally go home. Still haven't decided what I'm going to do when I get back though.

I don't know if I want to continue cooking after this. I'll be honest, I love my job, it's challenging, emotionally rewarding, I'm not bad at it, theres always room for improvement, but I feel I could get a job just about anywhere in the world and be a contributing member of the team. But one of the main reasons I took the job is I wanted to make people happy. But I've realized while I'm down here that those people I'm making happy are all strangers. I've never met them before, I'll probably never see them again. It's not like I don't like serving those people. It's just that I feel I should be home, serving my family, my friends, then strangers. The only thing I've ever loved more than cooking, is making people happy. I'm no longer sure that cooking is the best way to do that.

In my head, when I picture finally being at home after all of this. I don't picture working in a fancy restaurant or hotel. I picture being at home, at church, at youth group. Serving those people. And it's difficult to do that when you're spending 12-15 hours a day at work, sweating yourself raw, making strangers happy. Then to come home and have any energy left to take care of your family. And while I could enjoy that and have a fine life. I've realized that's not my first priority. It's in my top ten, but it's not number #1.

At this point, I haven't decided on anything yet. I'm waiting right now. Waiting for a door to open up, a path to clear itself, the streetlights to come on. So I can finally see where I'm going. Until then, I'm still gonna try and be good at my job. Because that's not a bridge I want to burn. But I'm not gonna make any plans until something reveals itself.

This is me, in flux. All things are subject to change. But I'm ready for it.

If the internet says it, it must be true

2007-06-02T21:41:00.001-05:00

Joshua Schick --

[adjective]:

Sexually stunning

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

I'm a machine

2007-05-24T19:40:00.000-05:00

I haven't worked less than 12 hours in at least a week. While this is not an unusual amount of hours in the foodservice industry, it is a large amount for me. But I find that spending more time at work just makes me that much better. I'm not distracted as often, my pace of work is steadier, and I'm better able to see the big picture. This is a good thing because we're busier than last year at this time, and we have less staff. So everybody is getting overtime hours. It's pretty easy for me to go to work at 10am and be there till midnight. Hurray for big paycheques :D

They've got me started in the Banquets area. And while thats where I first started out in the kitchen, it is still taking me some time to get back into that banquet mindset. Another week or two and I should be good though.

Been spending a lot of time with one of the new employees, Ryan. He's the Corporate Management trainee, cool guy, knows what he's doing. Incredibly overpaid, but meh. He just got a better deal than us. Once he finishes his 13 months here, he's supposed to be set up to take a sous chef's position at another Hyatt. Meanwhile I've got 18 months, and a recommendation at another hotel. At a lower rate of pay...awesome. The only real differences between us is he's a little older, and his culinary program was a year longer than ours.

Yeah, in reference to my last post. Didn't get any sleep that night, worked 15 and a half hours the next day. It was great great fun.

Isn't it wierd

2007-05-18T01:09:00.000-05:00

The nights you need sleep the most, it eludes you.

I worked a closing shift tonight at the restaurant. Four pm to midnight. Didn't get home till 12:30, and now it's 2 am. And I can't sleep. Mind is too busy. So I thought maybe I'll write some of it down so I can get some sleep before I get up at 5:10 to head off to work again. (that's 3 hours from now)

Things have changed a lot for me down here recently. It's taken a year, but I'm finally starting to feel comfortable around here. Like if I had to live here for the rest of my life, I could manage. It wouldn't be great, but it would be manageable.

Work is going well. I'm finally getting the hang of this restaurant working at nights. Mostly thanks to the efforts and ass kickings from Chef Tim. To whom I am quite grateful. I'm enjoying my job a little more. I still don't quite have the passion for it that I had back in highschool and culinary school. But I'm regaining that. We have a new Sous Chef in the hotel. Charles. He's here to shake things up I guess. And he's starting by targeting all the new interns for improvement.

This is not to say that Mikey was a bad chef or a bad manager. He was great at both things. But at times it felt like Mikey was keeping us at a professional arms distance. Emotionally detaching himself just in case he had to make a decision that would affect either his job or our job. But I guess managers have to be the bad guy sometimes.

Personally, while it is much more difficult to do, I've found that it's much more effective to employees who want to earn your respect. Rather than employees who want to avoid your wrath.

My relationships with people here are changing as well. I've been spending a lot more time "with the guys" than I ever did before. Before, many of the people I would call close friends were female. Now, they're mostly male. One or two once strong relationships have now fizzled, only to be replaced with stronger ones from pre-existing relationships. But the thing that's keeping me up all night tonight, is the fact that if I or said second parties made an effort, things could be fixed. But would it be for the better?

No man is ever so rich in friends, that he needs enemies.

For the past 5 or 6 years of my life, it's been my priority to please everybody. No request or need was too big that I couldn't sacrifice some of myself to fill it. While I am human and have made mistakes, it's been a sincere effort. If not entirely a successful one.

You could say that fate/god/the universe is somehow trying to teach me that this is not possible, or it's not healthy. That to try is to invite failure and pain. Pain that will eventually break me.

Bring it on.

One of the strongest themes it seemed throughout my childhood was, to be perfectly honest, the sermons of our favorite human pastor. Scott Williams. The things that always stuck out to me were when he spoke of how human beings build walls around themselves to protect them from pain and hurt. But in turn, they keep out love, compassion, and grace. Going through life, trying to be an Island. Alone and self sufficient. Whether this is true or not is up to you. I've found it to be true. So I've tried not to build walls. I've tried to trust people without expectations of failure. I've tried to be compassionate. To accept others for who and what they are. To find the best in them, and enjoy it. To emphasize the good, and discourage the bad. I've tried in every decision I make to put the good of other people first. Damn the pain that comes with it, I'll endure that as penance, and just use it as motivation to try harder the next time.

Am I successful? I don't believe so. The failures stick out more to me than the successes. I find myself lacking in many things I do. Theres always that room for improvement, that little bit extra that could have been done. But didn't get done, because of my laziness or my insecurities or my inabilities or even my ignorance. There are always going to be the sleepless nights where I look back on my actions and wonder where I went wrong and what I could have done better. What can I fix, and what is broken beyond repair.

I don't like having these broken relationships hanging over me. Whether it's better this way or not. But I don't think I can fix them. Not on my own. It takes two to Tango. And I can't dance.

Well, I'm getting that familiar burning of the eyes that tells me I've been staring at a white screen in a black room for too long. Maybe sleep will come easier now that some of my thoughts have been unburdened. Or maybe I've just started a chain reaction of interior soliloquy that will carry me on through to the next day.

Also, isn't it weird how when you try to sleep, you can't. But if I had gone downstairs and watched tv all through the night till the next morning. I would've been out like a light in 15 minutes.

Sleep is over rated. If I had one wish. I would wish to never require rest.

What to do...........

2007-03-17T01:02:00.000-05:00

Somehow, somewhere. I've lost my passion.

Cooking is no longer fun for me. It's a chore, a thing to be avoided, and the one thing I feared most.

A job.

I never thought I would say this, but I don't want to be a chef anymore.

I don't know how it happened, or when. Was I infected with the lethargy of those around me? Did I stop being challenged at some point? Is it because I'm not surrounded by things familiar? Or was I just never meant to be a cook? Was the past 4 years of my life a phase, a passing interest, a hobby I thought I could do for a living? Can I blame it on a guilty streak for my years of inactivity as a teenager? Along came something I enjoyed and thought I did well, so I threw myself into it with all I had.

I don't know the answers anymore. The things I once valued have changed. The things I never really cared for are becoming important. My goals are changing almost daily, and I struggle daily with wondering why....why me? Why do this? Why did they do that? Why keep doing it? What's the point......

I don't like who I've become lately. Short-tempered, isolated, and whiny as all hell (see entire journal post)

The only things keeping me from leaving so far have been the fact that I'd have to pay 800$ for cancelling my internship early. And a terrifying urge not to be the first to break. I'm certain if one other in the same situation as I'm in caved, I'd be right behind them. Probably passing them once the race started.

I keep waiting for something to change. Something drastic. For a revelation. A great "aha" moment where I realize all my wrongdoings, and am able to correct them like turning on a light switch. I know such moments don't exist outside of Hollywood Cinema, but that doesn't stop me from hoping now does it?

I have no plans right now, other than to endure. To hope. To wait for that great "aha" moment.

Maybe these are the insomniatic ramblings of a depressed youth. Maybe all young cooks go through this when they realize that this career is not all free food and playing with cool knives. Perchance this mood will fade. The only "aha" moment when I realize what a baby I'm being. Maybe this is all just a manifestation of my seemingly never-ending loneliness.

I don't even quite know why I'm writing all this down here. There are other more private places I can write. Where I'm not so vulnerable. I'm sure someone with a less than stellar opinion of me will read this, as is bound to happen whenever I write something down, and use it against me. Is this a cry for attention, help, pity?

"Ask again later."
Even the magic 8 ball, oracle of chance and fate, mocks my pain!

Enough introspection and self pity for the night. Don't worry, I'll still have plenty of it left for tomorrow. Hopefully we'll be busy enough that I can drown my self in some work. Temporarily distract myself from the extreme letdown my life has become.

Lately

2007-02-13T23:51:00.000-06:00

Seems like doing the wrong thing has become my modus operandi lately.

Or so I've been told.

Indian Cooking

2007-02-08T03:42:00.000-06:00

So I've had this book that I've been reading slowly for a while. The Indian Kitchen. It's a cookbook on all things classically Indian. I love this book. Every time I read it I feel a huge rush of inspiration. For example. Ever had an apple fritter? Of course, they're pretty common. In French cooking, they can make fritters out of anything. It's basically flavored unleavened dough. But an Indian fritter is another thing altogether. First, you mix the flour and water, then you have to let it ferment and rise! I know all you non-cooks out there are going "so....you're point is?" but for those of you in the know. This is just one more step towards creating something delicious.

Indian cooking is all about aroma and looks. I know, you're thinking "But shouldn't it taste good?" Of course, but our noses and mouths are so closely linked. If something smells good, it usually tastes good, right? In most parts of India, there are religious taboos against eating food while it's cooking. So Indian cooks have to rely on all their other senses to gauge when food is ready or flavored correctly. Looking to see if a sauce has reached the appropriate glaze, touching a piece of meat to see if it's tender, breathing deep the fragrance of a saffron pilaf to see if it needs more Usli ghee (that's clarified butter) or even just listening for the right amount of sizzle when you're frying onions.

Not to say that all these skills aren't developed in French cooking, they are. But Taste is always the final judge and jury. Indian cooks don't always have that luxury, so they're forced to develop their other senses.

I like to think of Indian cooks as the comic book character Daredevil. He may be blind, but he can still kick your ass. They may not be able to taste, but they can still out cook you any day of the week.

I think I'm going to try and make samosas at work sometime in the next week, it depends on business, and availability of ingredients. But I'm going to try dang nabbit. MMmmmmm spicy potato filling, flaky crispy golden brown crust. My mouth is watering just thinking about it.

Also, a large part of my fascination with Indian cuisine is that I used to work for an East Indian Chef. Living in the Fraser Valley, a large percentage of the population is Sikh. It also helps their cause that Chef Elvis (that was his real name) is largely responsible for making me the cook I am today. Before, I knew what I was doing, but I wasn't truly aware of what kind of dedication it took to be truly good at something. Chef Elvis gave me all sorts of encouragement and motivation. He even let me screw up a couple times, just so I'd learn my lesson all the better. If it wasn't for him, I'd probably still be cooking at Boston Pizza, with aspirations of one day being a chef. Thinking that assembling pizzas was gonna get me there. I truly believe that with him as my chef, I was a better cook. Better than I am today.

If you ever read this, thanks Chef.

What I did when I went home

2007-01-30T13:47:00.000-06:00

Me and Teej
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQD7-ySwpxk

Joel playing with Lighter fluid
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rd4PO4-LRfI

My brother in the snow
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3TA57fM2eM

Me and Joel at Mill Pond
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yfk7J_NoIRg

Back in Maryland, and it's snowing?

2007-01-21T20:25:00.000-06:00

So I'm back, I made it through all 3 flights just fine, despite snow and delays in Chicago. Stupid Chicago.

I've decided I like taking off, I like flying, I just don't like landing. Nobody ever dies flying, they die landing.

Brought my guitar back with me, so now I have something to do with all my spare time. It's pretty cool. I've already re-learned one song I used to know. And I'm working on another. My fingers are getting callused again. Woohoo.

It's snowing here now. Not a lot, about an inch. Just enough to have some fun on the roads mwahahahahaha.

Nah, I'm joking. I'm not gonna wreck my car. Not when I share it with someone else. If it was all mine though, oh man. I'd be pro at the e-brake turns by now.

Bought a webcam. Should be fun. Oh well. Nothing too important to report. Later all.

Going Back to Maryland in less than 9 hours

2007-01-14T23:31:00.000-06:00

To be honest, it's a bit of a relief.

Don't get me wrong, I've had one of the best weeks of my life. It's been amazing coming home and visiting all my friends and family I haven't seen in a while. You don't truly appreciate something until it's gone. And I was gone for 7 months. 7 months is far too long to go without the people you love.

But this entire week has been a rollercoaster. Up and down and all around emotionally. I love rollercoasters, but I don't wanna live on one. I'm ready to set my feet back on the ground, pick up my popcorn, come down off my sugar high, and head back to work. It'll be nice to just wake up, go to work, and come home.

Granted, that'll be nice for about 3 days, then I'll be wanting to come home again. I'll be back to my mopey self again. Sitting in my boring ass room with my boring ass car, empty ass house, and semi flat air mattress. (oh man is a real bed sweet after 7 months of air mattress)

I figure I'll just throw myself into work to drown my homesickness. 7 Days a week (if I can get the shifts) Here I come. I'll be tired, but I'll be raking in the extra dough like nobodies business.

There are far too many people I'm going to miss in Canada.

So I'm home now

2007-01-10T19:45:00.000-06:00

And Why WHY did I ever leave? How could I think that this place of good food, family that loves me, beautiful scenery, beautiful women, potential for greatness, and basically everything that I value, could ever be annoying and tiresome?

You know what, I complain a lot about Maryland. I shouldn't, I'm sure it's a wonderful place to live. But it's not my home. There is NO place like home. I know it's an old cliche but it's so damn true. I really have no reason to go back, theres nothing there that I don't have here. But I'm gonna go back anyways. I said I'd work there for a year and a half. And that's what I'm gonna do. Even if my heart is here, in B.C. I'm going to hate it, and I'm going to wish every single second that I was home. But I'm going to do it. Because my word is my life.

Lets face it, I'm not a particularly talented individual. I'm a good cook, but not because I was meant to be. I'm good because I worked at it. I worked my ass off. And I worked at it because I promised myself I was going to. I may be good at things, but not because I was born with that gift. I'm good at working hard, and even that is a relatively new development in my life. It wasn't until I graduated that I actually started working hard.

What I'm trying to say here is, I don't have a lot, I'm not a person destined for greatness. I can't control how talented I am, or how skilled I am, or even what luck throws my way. But what I can control is how hard I work. I can control what comes out of my mouth, I can control what kind of person I want to be.

So to hell with all the things I can't control. And all the things that I can are mine, I'll grab them by the horns and wrestle them to the ground. And if I'm anything in this world, I'm a man of my word. Because so very often, your word is all you have.

Things to do when I get home

2007-01-03T17:30:00.000-06:00

Tim Hortons
Wendy's
Learn to drive standard
Shannons going away party
get the last of presents for the family
Hang out with as many friends as possible
Hang out with Tasha
Hug my puppy
Sleep in a real bed
Cook a holiday dinner for my family and whoever else wants to join, spare no expense
All you can eat Sushi
Go to Church
Go to Youth group
Go to Guys night
Pack up guitar to bring back with me
Get as many photos of family and friends as possible
Possibly Polar Bear Swim at Cascade
Eat
Eat
Eat
Eat
Eat as much as I can while the food is the food I associate with home.

If I've forgotten anything or anyone, please let me know. I'll try to avoid sleeping as much as I can while I'm home, so that I'll have more time with everyone.

ha HA

2006-12-31T11:30:00.000-06:00

In the year 2007 I resolve to:
Pick my nose at stop lights.

Get your resolution here.

words to live (or die) by

2006-12-28T11:09:00.000-06:00

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the
intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well
preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in
one hand, martini in the other, totally worn out and
screaming,

"WOO HOO what a ride!"

Also

"So many people tiptoe through life, only to arrive at deaths door safe and sound."

Christmas without family is like Chocolate without Taste

2006-12-26T17:56:00.000-06:00

This is the first time I've worked on Christmas. Although I doubt it will be the last. One of the disadvantages of this career is when everyone else is celebrating, we're the busiest. All the first 3 weeks of December, we'll be lucky to do 50 people during service. Then Christmas comes along and we get fubared. Over 150 covers. Who goes out for Christmas Breakfast!? You're supposed to be at home with your family opening presents. Not telling us your eggs are slightly underdone and you want your meal free. This is probably why lots of cooks are totally fed up with Christmas, for us it's the most stressful time of the year, on top of the shopping and stuff that normal deal with. Work is busier than ever, people are short tempered, and we don't get to spend any time with our families ourselves.

The reason I'm ranting is because I didn't get to spend Christmas with my family. I think I'm the first person to ever miss a Christmas in my family. That's hard. It used to be, when I was living at home and saw them every day, that I didn't think it would be that bad to have a christmas without them. OH MAN was I wrong. All I could think about for the last week is how it doesn't feel like christmas. It just feels like another week of the year.

I can't wait to go home. I hope it snows. Theres so much stuff I have to do. It seems like every time I think about it theres another 3 or 4 things I have to add to my list of stuff to do. 1 week isn't going to be enough. You're going to have to cuff me and drug me to get me back on that plane at the end of it.

Things lately....

2006-12-23T19:14:00.000-06:00

GAH! the winter season is so slow. There are some days at the restaurant where I cook for 5 people all day long. It's so wasteful when you consider the amount of food we have to keep prepared on our line "Just in case." Ok, quick example. We make a crab salad sandwich for lunch. Say we make a 5lb batch of crab salad. It sounds like a lot. But if we do get busy it goes pretty quick. A pound of crab is going for about 15$ these days. So 5x15=85. Right? 85$ for a batch of crab salad. Crab salad only lasts for about 4 days before it starts to go south. If we get a busy day in there, then we'll probably use it all. But say we don't. Half of that batch is going in the garbage. That's 42$ in the garbage. 42$ that the hotel will never see again. And this is just one item on our menu, in one of our 7 or 8 outlets. Stuff like this happens all the time. It's astounding how the hotel can keep in business. Just the fact that there is somebody who has to track all this money, and that someday that guy might be me. That's a scary scary thought. It's easy to see how some chef's can get so caught up in paperwork that they never get to cook anymore. Which is something I don't think I could ever do. Ack! Pencil Pushing = SATAN! Descending into the evil hell that is a desk job is the stuff of my nightmares. I'm a man of action dammit! Something needs doing....I do it. That's it.

Me and Erin work lunch and morning shifts. Everyone else works dinner shifts. Which works out well. Nobody has to stay up till midnight to give the other person a ride home.

Still have to get a present for Brad and Erin. I'm sure I could go out to wal-mart and get them something pretty easy. But that just seems like copping out to me. These are people that are important to me. I should be able to find something awesome for them. I'd rather get them nothing than get some crappy gift they'll say thank you for, then never think twice about. If I have to bankrupt myself. So be it. What else is money good for if not giving away? Screw hoarding.

I have a computer....all is good with the world. Please feel free to e-mail me pictures. I miss everyone back home.

Guess what I got!

2006-12-22T11:48:00.000-06:00

I BOUGHT A LAPTOP! FINALLY!

It's a Toshiba Satellite. It has an Intel Duo Core Processor, 1GB ram, and wireless internet. AND THAT"S ALL THAT REALLY MATTERS BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

so now I can finally update this thing on a semi-regular basis. and actually talk to people from back home!

OH HAPPY DAY!

I'm Comin home!!!

2006-12-07T13:35:00.000-06:00

January 8th to the 15th. It's official. I have the days off of work and the flight is booked. You had all better make sure you're free that week. I plan on spending little to no time sleeping. So bring Red Bulls.

Here are a list of places that I MUST go. Mostly because they don't have them in America.

Tim Hortons.
Church.

That is all.

Even thinking about returning home I get a craving for Chili in a bread bowl....mmmmmm chili. I don't care if it's made from a powder. It's GOOD dammit!

I plan on eating a lot. Because food back home is better than food here. I may go visit VCC. I doubt I'll have time though. I'm only home for a week.

GAH! so many people to see in a week. Amanda, TJ, Tasha, Parents, Joel, James, Nicole, Nathan, Misty, Cooper, Phil, Aaron, Shannon, Mel, Erin, Mandi, JohnHeng, Britney. Gonna try and see some people from school. Gotta try and go to Youth group.

Lots of stories to tell, most of them include me in some sort of skintight clothing. I AM THE LORD OF THE DANCE! Micheal Flatley ain't got nothin on me.

Can't wait to see you all.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

2006-11-16T19:44:00.000-06:00

this is so dorky it's cool.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RERXiliJfdI&eurl=

A few videos to help pass the time

2006-11-01T20:56:00.000-06:00

This guy does some excellent poetry readings. Too bad there's only two of them.

The Childrens Hour, By Henry Longfellows
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptKu9cc0ji4

And something to go with the halloween spirit. The Cremation of Sam McGee, By Robert Service
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lBkuz1TlVc

A walk

2006-10-19T19:54:00.000-05:00

So when I got home from work today, I didn't really feel like hanging around the house. I was restless. I thought about working out, but didn't feel like getting sweaty right after taking a shower. So, considering it was a cool fall night, I went for a walk. I went around the housing area I live in, out in the fields down the block. And along the main road here. I thought about what had changed in my life now that I had come here, and how it had affected me. I thought about the ways I had acted in the past, before my trip, and how I had acted since I came here. It used to be I was a fairly stable and collected person. It took a lot to ruffle my feathers. Now it seems that the slightest gust of wind sends my mental china cabinet through a window. I didn't know why I had changed, or when. But I have.

I thought about it some more, didn't come to a conclusion. Then I decided to pray on it. After a little while of sitting on an electrical box on the edge of a cornfield, it struck me that I have not been to church, or hung out with someone who had the same ideals as me ever since I've come down here. And the absence is starting to take it's effect.

I don't have that stability in my life anymore. Church grounded me, gave me resolve. Because I knew that come Sunday morning, I would again be surrounded by people who wanted me to succeed in my life. Who wanted me to have strong character and integrity. My successes were theres, and theres mine. It was a community of spiritual betterment. I don't have that here.

I've realized there are things inside of me that I don't ever want to let loose. Anger, Jealousy, Pettiness, Deceit. I can't control those things by myself. I need god in my life. I need that support, that rock in the hurricane. Without it, I'm all too exposed. I'm corruptible. And far weaker than I ever thought.

About food

2006-10-10T18:25:00.000-05:00

I've realized I've had this blog for almost 6 months, and I have yet to blog about food. And that's just no good for a chef.

So heres the recipe for one of the specials we've gotten to do in the last little while at the restaurant.

Warning, it's written for a cook, so I'm gonna skip things like amounts, you add if you think theres more. Just remember, the only thing you can take away once it's added is water.

Roasted Penne Pasta, with Portabello, pea tips, and sweet peas. Served with White Wine cream sauce and lobster.

(we used lobster in this recipe, as there was tons of it in the hotel at the time)

First you want to dice all your ingrediants. Try to cut them into pieces about the same size as the Penne Pasta, that way when you eat it with a fork you don't just get vegetables, or just pasta, you get a little bit of everything. The Pea tips you can just rip into 2 inch long pieces. Portabello mushrooms you have clean them by breaking off the stem and scraping off the black "gills" with a spoon. (the dark dark ridges on the underside of the mushroom, they should flake right off if the mushrooms are fresh) You take them off because if left on, they have a bitter taste, and will turn everything they touch black. You can buy frozen peas if you like, but I find that the whole fresh ones, still in the pods, have a far far far far far far better taste and texture.

Cut the vegetables any size you want, these are just recommendations. In the end it's your own preferences that will give you the best dish.

If you do decide to use lobster, pre cook it by steaming it in a very large high sided pot with just a few cups of water. you don't have to cook it all the way. Just partially, so the meat will pull away from the shell when you crack it open. Just don't forget to put the lobster into lots of ice water right after you take it out. It'll make the meat contract and pull away. Making your life easier when you crack it open.

You can use other seafood if you like. Try to use something slightly sweet, like shrimp, or scallops. As they will compliment the peas and other ingrediants best. But you can use whatever you want.

To roast the pasta. Get a large very heavy pot, and heat some vegetable oil in it to smoking hot.Pour the dry pasta into it, and let it sit for about 10 seconds, so it can brown a bit, then give it a stir, let it brown, give it a stir, brown. Continue until you have the right amount of roasting you want. you want a nice dark brown, but not black. It'll smell deliciously of popcorn cooked over a fire. Meanwhile have a pot of boiling water off to the side. Once the pasta is roasted the way you like it just pour the already hot water over it. It'll come to a boil very very quickly. Then cook according to package directions.

Please be very careful, you are working with hot oil and water over a hot element. If the water boils over there is a very good chance of a flameup. So be ready to turn off the element and move the pot off the burner if it looks like it's about to boil over. Wear a long sleeved shirt to avoid splattering burns on your forearms. Unless you're like me and want to get some cool scars to show off.

Ok, that's all your Prep, also known as Mis en Place (french for Everything in Place)
Once your Mis is done. Have it all set up within easy access close to your stove.

Start with some butter and olive oil in a pan over medium high heat.. This won't burn as easy as just butter. Wait for the butter to stop spitting, this means all the water has evaporated. Add your vegetables and saute until cooked. You can also add a pinch of salt and some minced garlic here if that suits your fancy. Add your seafood and toss with the hot vegetables until just warmed. Now add your precooked seafood (in this case lobster, if your seafood isn't precooked, just add it in with the vegetables) Now add some white wine to the vegetables. It will steam and sizzle, and maybe flare up a little if your pan is too hot. Don't worry, that's just the alchohol burning off. It'll go away if you reduce the heat and stop flipping the veg in the pan. Wait for that to reduce down until it's almost gone. Then add about 2 shots worth of cream. toss it all to coat. (the Cream can be ommitted, it just helps to make sure the sauce sticks to the pasta and veg) Now slowly simmer that over medium heat until everything sticks, and the sauce doesn't just collect at the bottom of the pan. Pile it high in a bowl and finish with a bit of parmesan cheese. Enjoy it.

I wish I had a picture to show you. It truly looks wonderful with the roasted penne. You can roast other pastas as well, orzo, or tagliatelle, or even spaghetti if you do a little bit at a time. This adds a whole new texture and dimension to the pasta. Like eating bread without crust your whole life, then suddenly having a thick french baguette with lots of butter on it for the first time.

The thing about all recipes is you're free to play around with them. If you want to use corn instead of peas. or Spinach instead of pea tips, or sherry instead of white wine. You can. It's all up to your personal preference. You have to eat it, so use ingrediants YOU like. (unless your cooking for discerning customers in a fast paced fine dining enviroment. then cook it the way they want it)

Once you learn how to saute, and roast pasta, and reduce sauces. You can use these techniques in every dish you cook. It's all about playing with your food.

Well thats my first blog about just food in 5 months. I'll try and do another recipe at least once a week. Enjoy and Bon appetite!

Warning! My opinion will be stated loud and clear in this blog, if you don't like it then don't read it!

2006-09-27T22:56:00.000-05:00

Sorry I haven't been blogging often. I don't yet have a computer of my own. And I don't like to ask other people if I can borrow theirs. Fortunatly, Justin left his computer here while he's off in Washington for the night. So here I am.

Things are pretty uneventful here for the most part. Of course there are the small arguements that go on in the house. Someone forgot to pass on a message, nobody cleans up after themselves. blah blah blah. (so strange how everyone complains, but nobody does anything about it) It's the same little things every day that tend to pile up, and eventually I just get sick of, and I'm in a bad mood for the day. Then Brad will make a joke, or we'll all go out for dinner and get along really well. And I'll feel better.

Although lately a couple of things have been getting on my nerves. I've been teased a lot in my life, it happens. It's rarely malecious, and usually I can laugh it off and make another joke about myself, and everyone else has a laugh as well. But lately I've been taking things more personally. I know they're just teasing me, and they don't really mean it. But I can't help but feel like they're trying to barb me, enrage me, piss me off so they can all have a laugh when "Mother" Josh loses his temper. I'm constantly fighting off the urge to blow up in someones face and totally lay everything, absolutly everything, out on the table. Just because I feel like I should assert myself, and then they'll respect me. I know thoughts like this are gonna get me in trouble. I'm gonna say something I regret, do something I'll regret. Lose a friend, cause everyone some grief, make the whole house uncomfortable for the next couple of days. Something like that. And I would HATE to be the person who was known for doing that. No matter how softly people would tread around me afterwards. I'd still feel like an asshole. And an asshole is not what I want to be. I'd rather be the guy who everyone knows you can never piss him off. Then someone who flies off the handle at the slightest thing.

What I'm trying to say is, I'd rather be respected for being patient, than be feared for having a short temper. Even though most times I'm screaming and cursing my head off inside and I just wanna break something.

Second thing that's been annoying me. Cleanliness of the house. I know, there are 10 people living here now, it's only a 4 bedroom house really. We go through the basics (eggs, milk, tp) like they're candy in a pinata. But when everybody has something to drink, and doesn't wash their cup, that's 10 cups in the sink. and seven times out of 10. I'll end up cleaning it. That's fine, I'm ok with cleaning. It's when people start saying "Nobody in this house cleans up after themselves" and I know, I KNOW that half the bowls and chopsticks in the sink are theirs. That's when I wanna rip heads off. This is especially aggravating because one of the unspoken policies of being a chef is if you see a mess, clean it up, regardless of whether or not you made it. Now why on earth can't people do that at home? Now I do generalize a bit, every once in a while someone will clean up after themselves. But that's it. They'll clean their dishes, but not the dishes that are already in the sink. Nobody does anything that needs to be done. I know when I clean up the kitchen. I clean up the kitchen regardless of whomevers mess it is. Then people have the audacity to say "This house is a pigstye, people should clean up after themselves" (as they proceed to rinse their bowl and spoon in the sink, ignoring the pot and bowl already in there) Everybody is being hypocritic.

I'm not perfect, occasionally I leave a bowl of rice around, or forget to finish my drink and it's sitting on one of the tv tables for a day or two. Yeah, I'll admit, I'm not the cleanest guy around. But if I'm gonna clean the kitchen for everybody, so they can have a nice place to make themselves a midnight snack when they get home from work. The least they can do is pick up the cup I forgot to put away and put it in the dishwasher for me. I feel like I'm giving away all my time and effort, and not getting a damn thing in return. (then Erin comes home and tells me I did nothing on my days off.......*makes choking motion with hands* Just because I didn't get out of the house doesn't mean I didn't do anything.)

I can't wait to get a car, although I don't know how well sharing it with erin is going to work. I'm not saying that she's gonna ditch me at work or something like that. She's responsible, she'll take care of whats important first. But Erin is a very social person, she likes to get out of the house and hangout with other people. I'm a bit more a couch potato. I feel like she's gonna be going out with the car, hanging out with people, and because I don't feel like going out at the time or I'm not around. She's gonna end up having it most of the time. And it'll end up being an unfair deal. Whatever, I'll tackle that problem when I come to it. No sense in worrying about it now. The car hasn't even been repaired yet.

Geez, all I feel like I'm doing these days is complaing, and finding things to complain about. So on to some good things. (I'm afraid this will be a much shorter list than the previous one)

Jackie, Micheal Chan, and justin are all leaving, while this isn't the good news, quite the opposite in fact. The Good news is they're leaving us a whole bunch of stuff (pots, pans, fans, lamps, etc) for the measly low price of 100$. Good deal.

Now that the menu over at the restuarant has been trimmed down for the slow winter season. Chefs Mikie and Shean have decided that we're going to be doing a daily special. And while it doesn't often sell (it's the most expensive thing on the menu at 18$) I usually get to do something I've been wanting to try, or Chef will give me something cool to do. (Roasted pasta, who'se ever heard of that!?) So it's an excellent opportunity to learn some new stuff. Also Jackie, our Korean intern, has been cooking some authentic korean meals at home for our enjoyment. (Cold beef tongue with korean Ketchup and tripe anyone?) I'm finally picking up some new tricks, which is what I came down here for in the first place.

I've been working out a bit more regularly. I'll exercise until I can barely lift the weights anymore, than rest for a day, until everything stops hurting. Then go at it again. I'm kinda noticing a difference. My endurance is increasing. Which is what I was aiming for. Although I'd still like to build a little muscle mass. I still feel skinny.

Today, I walked to the corner store too see if they had milk (they do!) and eggs(they don't) and on the way back a really cute girl positively beamed at me when I said hello. So I guess I'm doing something right. On the other hand, other girls (a certain one in particular who will remain nameless) confuse the hell outta me.

Anyways, it's after midnight. I still have to go shave, or I'll forget tomorrow morning and Mikie will get mad. (guys got a beard himself)and I gotta wake up early so I can get to work on time (it takes an hour to walk, another reason I can't wait to get the car) And I still gotta try and calm my mind down enough so that I can sleep peacefully.

Goodnight all, I miss everyone back home terribly. Give me a call if you're ever bored and it's after 3 o'clock your time. You can get the number from my parents.

Until next time.

New things happening?....kinda

2006-09-14T14:13:00.000-05:00

so the previous canadian interns, Mike and Justin, have moved out of their basement suite into our house for the remainder of their stay here. Along with the Korean intern Jackie. There are now 9 people living in this house. 9 people living in the house and I'm here all alone.

I find myself looking for things to keep me busy. I do a lot of cleaning. Everyday I do at least a few dishes. The other day I baked about 8 dozen cookies. I tried making pizza dough, but it didn't turn out as well as I hoped.

I've taken up working out lately. We bought some exercise equipment off of one of the cooks at work who's moving to Korea to live with his girlfriend. So I've been going for 20-25 minute runs every other day or so, then working out on the equipment. Haven't seen any results yet, but it's only really been a week. You better watch out Phil, when I come back I'll be able to throw you across the room mwahahahahaha.

Not much to report. Just trying to keep busy to keep myself from going nuts with homesickness.

I'll see if I can get pictures of my new housemates up soon.

P.S Thanks for Chef Goofie Misty, he's perfect :)

This Place.

2006-08-13T01:35:00.000-05:00

I hate this place. I truly do not wish to live here any longer. My job sucks. I'm not learning anything I couldn't be learning at home, with my family and friends close by. I'm constantly reminded that this is not Vancouver. It's about as different as two places can get without leaving the continent.

This is not the place for me. The only plus I can see to staying down here, is that I'll be able to make and save some money. And that is not something I want to be on my list of priorities.

When I started this career path. I made a personal choice that it would not be about the money. I would do this job because I loved it. That was the only way I felt I could be successful and happy doing it. When I started doing this for money, then it became a job. And I didn't want to have a job for the next 40 or 50 years of my life. I was constantly reminded that it takes a lot of passion to be successful as a chef or a cook. I thought "awesome, my priorities are on track. I'm gonna be just fine if I keep this up." I placed all my energy into becoming better at my craft. Often working for free, just for the chance to hone my skills.

And all my dedication was paying off. I had an excellent job, I was learning tons, and on the wayside I was even making a decent amount of money.

Then I came here. To Cambridge Maryland.....Culinary shithole of the east coast. The food I prepare....it's not GOOD. I do my best. But nothing I do can change the Chef's specifications. And while I like my Restaurant Chef, he's a great guy, with a lot of passion for food. Often I find his food lacking in something. A poor presentation, he doesn't use quality ingrediants, the flavors don't mesh well, or I'm even just confused by the plate. (Cajun swordfish (creole style) Saffron Rice (East Indian style) Jicama slaw (Mexican style) and a Thai coleslaw. I haven't even tasted the dish yet, I'm actually afraid to.)

They won't even ALLOW me to work overtime here. Not even for free. Because if I get injured then I'm not covered by insurance. Even though I paid 600$ for health insurance before I was even allowed to cross the border. So I'm stuck working 8 hours, making food I don't enjoy making. 90% of my co-workers I only tolerate because I must, or I'll go crazy. They have as much passion for food as a rock does for sitting there. It doesn't really do it because it likes it, it does it because it doesn't have a choice. It's only a rock. People only come to work because they need a paycheque. They don't come because the enjoy cooking. Most of them actually hate their job, but Hyatt pays better than most of the places around here. So they keep coming to work, making crappy food. Not one of them would have been able to hold down their job in the places where I've worked. And I know that makes me sound like an arrogant asshole but it's just plain true. I work harder, better, more efficiently, and turn out a better product than they do.

The only bit of satisfaction I get is looking at my savings account. And it's saying stuff like that that drives me insane. I have NEVER wanted to be the kind of person that values money. Just the opposite. If you ever spend any time with me I'm always buying people things, lending them money. Trying to get rid of it as best I can. I. Do. Not. Want. A. Lot. Of. Money. If I can have enough to keep my debt off. I'm happy.

I've noticed when I work. I'm a much more sullen, angry, impatient person than I am anywhere else. I doubt any of you would recognize me if you came to the hotel and saw me working the line. I don't sing in the kitchen, I only speak when spoken to, I'm snappy and terse around servers, or anybody asking me for anything. I constantly do as little as I can get away with. Avoiding cooking orders.

This place is turning me into something I don't want to be. Someone who does this because they need the money. Not because they enjoy their job.

I want to go home.

What a waste of two days off.

2006-08-03T17:56:00.000-05:00

I had today and yesterday off. All I've done is watch tv and play the new super mario brothers game for DS. I'm so bored here. Cambridge is a smaller town than the town I came from (10,000 as opposed to 30,000) and it's at least half an hours drive to the next biggest city. It's an hour and a half to the beach. And I don't even have a car. If I wanna go anywhere I have to bike or walk. Which is downright scary in this heat (heat warnings till friday) So basically I'm stuck in the house till I go to work tomorrow. All we have to do is tv. And I can only stand that for so long. At least if I was home I could hang out with some friends.

I wish I could work overtime, then I could drown my loneliness in work. At least at work I have something to DO.

Boredom is my worst enemy.

What the!?

2006-07-25T16:15:00.000-05:00

Where did all this jealousy come from?

The Roomies

2006-07-20T21:04:00.000-05:00

I just thought I'd let you all know who I'm living with right now. So that when I get in trouble, you'll all know who to blame. Because I'm Josh, and therefore innocent of all charges.

First off, there's Mike. The first of my Culinary school buddies.

Mike was the first friend I made at Culinary school, and he proved to be my number one competition throughout most of it. He usually managed to edge me out by the least little bit on every test and report card. He's extremely passionate about fine dining and serving elaborate, delicious plates. Sometimes his visions of granduer get ahead of practicality, and I have to bring him down to earth a little bit. But that in turn just inspires me to even greater acts of culinary prowess. Lets say he errs on overdoing it, and I err on underdoing it. Together we balance quite nicely. I'l give it to the man, he can cook. But he's a bit of a doofus.

Next off is Erin, the second of my culinary buddies.

Erin is a tiny girl with a big heart. She's like the Grinch after he heard all the Whoo's singing Christmas Carols. Full of bubbles and cheer and smiles. But underneath it all is a clever, calculating, organized mind. She rarely misses a thing, and if you give her half a chance, she'll soon have you doing things her way, and thinking it was your idea in the first place. Because I know this, I can be a stubborn ass sometimes and do the exact opposite, just to show I can't be "manipulated." which makes things difficult. I dig in my heels when I should compromise, or listen to her perspective fairly.

Third is Brendon. Our very own Veteran of the industry.

Don't let the picture fool you. Brendon has been cooking in his dad's Greasy spoon restaurant since he was 14. He's faster, more organized, and more scarred than all of us put together. He's demanding, uncompromising, and doesn't give a flying squirrels hide if he pisses you off in the process. In other words. He'll make an excellent restuarant chef. He also watches out for his buddies when they're in trouble. Even if he got them there in the first place. (think Hyde off of "That 70's Show) I'm fairly certain that as soon as Brendon gets back to Vancouver. He'll start up his own restaurant, and be offering us jobs, most likely peeling potatoes or washing dishes. If you respect Brendon, you'll get along just fine with him.

These were the first to join me on my trip across the country. I won't pretend that we get along all the time. Or even that we get along most of the time. But we still manage to live together, without killing each other. Even though we've all got lots of very sharp knives.

On the next episode of "Days of our Maryland Lives." I'll introduce Shawn and Brad. The newest of my cooking colleagues.

Couldn't have picked a better one myself :)

2006-07-18T19:02:00.000-05:00

You scored as William Wallace. The great Scottish warrior William Wallace led his people against their English oppressors in a campaign that won independence for Scotland and immortalized him in the hearts of his countrymen. With his warrior's heart, tactician's mind, and poet's soul, Wallace was a brilliant leader. He just wanted to live a simple life on his farm, but he gave it up to help his country in its time of need.

William Wallace

83%

Captain Jack Sparrow

79%

The Amazing Spider-Man

79%

Neo, the "One"

67%

Batman, the Dark Knight

67%

Maximus

63%

Indiana Jones

58%

The Terminator

54%

Lara Croft

46%

El Zorro

33%

James Bond, Agent 007

29%

Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0
created with QuizFarm.com

Ocean City and other thoughts

2006-07-13T22:22:00.000-05:00

So Mike, Mike, Erin, Brad, and I all went to Ocean City today.

Have you ever seen a movie where it shows the "stereotypical" beach boardwalk, with t-shirt shops, carnival games, and rides. That's exactly what it looked like. Down to the last tee. Except, the people weren't as pretty as they are on T.V. They never are.

But let me say this. The girls in Vancouver are so gorgeous. In vancouver, every time you're done craning your neck for the last girl, another pops into sight, and you're doing this the entire time you're walking down the streets.

Here, in the touristtrapprettypeopleinbathingsuitsonthebeach city of Maryland, it was hard to find a pretty girl that wasn't already taken.

So on the hour and a half long drive home. Needless to say we were all pretty tired. So we just drove, and listened to music, and chilled. It was quiet, and peaceful. So I had a lot of time to think.

I'm beginning to dread being left alone with my thoughts. Whenever I have long periods of time with which to ponder. I start to nitpick at my life. Analyzing and critiqueing it. Thinking about things I could have done better, things I should do that might make my life better. Emotional troubles I've had in the past. Emotional troubles I have now. Financial things, lots of financial things. I think a lot about work, goals I want to set for myself. (going through every station of every outlet in a year, in a year and a half program.) And I pick it all apart. And by the time it's over, I'm overcome with a feeling of melancholy. Of almost bone deep sorrow that never truly seems to fade. It spoils the times I could be enjoying with my friends. Being silly and loud and obnoxious, and having a good time. It spoils my work, nobody wants to work when they're not feeling like they're accomplishing anything. It even dictates my future mood. ( I made a conscious thought that I would mope around tomorrow, and if anyone asked I would say I was homesick)

As always, Happiness remains elusive.

What's this? a small flame of passion re-kindled?

2006-07-09T20:51:00.000-05:00

so there are tons out outlet malls around here. half in hour in any direction. So everytime we go to one, I head over to the book store, and straight to the cook book section.

On my last visit to the outlet mall. I picked up an Italian cookbook called "Cooking By hand." by Paul Bertolli. He's the executive Chef of Oliveto restuarant.

The opening introduction is "Good cooking is trouble." as soon as I read that I realized that I would love this book. He goes on to say that any food with lots of love in it, is just a hard, laborious, time consuming thing. But the end result is so often so very worth it.

This is exactly the philosphy I've adopted as a chef. Cooking is hard, intense, unforgiving, low paying, brow beating, painful work. But when someone comes up to you after a 12 hour day, and says it was the best meal they've had in their life, and they shake your hand and thank you. That is an awesome feeling. Or just finishing a banquet for 500 people, and they give you a standing ovation, cheer, and some of the older ladies wink at you and smile. Also one of the best feelings in the world.

Anyways, back to the book. It's freakin amazing. There is an entire chapter on tomatoes. It goes on for a page and a half on the acidity of them. I've learned more about cooking from reading the first 2 chapters, then I have in the entire time I've been down here so far. It has a chapter on making your own pasta. On choosing the right flour for the job, on grading and evaluating flour. If you're making a very clear sauce for your pasta noodles. Choose a flour that has a bit more color to it, to give you those bright yellow noodles. How to mill your own flour. (I wanna buy a home flour mill now) It goes into great detail on all the subtle subtle differences between ingrediants. How an heirloom tomato may not have as great of a yield as a field tomato, but that's because it's not as watered down, and therefore more concentrated. And a million other things to consider when you purchase produce.

Theres 2 pages on the importance of picking something ripe, in season. When it's at it's most natural and beautiful. Some of the most beautiful delicate flavors can be gotten from just slicing your mushrooms (fresh picked) as thin as possible, instead of sauteing them with a ton of butter, garlic, onions, and just reducing them until they're dark and shapeless. (which is still a tasty way of doing it, but heat Dramatically changes the flavor and texture of mushrooms) He talks about pears for one of those pages. How a perfectly ripe pear is a bite of heaven. But waiting for them to ripen is an extreme test of patience and judgement. (Pears tend to rot from the inside out) You can have a pear on your tabletop for 4 days, and it'll be hard as a rock still, then you can leave for 4 hours, and come back to it a black mass of ugly.

It's books like this, thoughts, ideals. That make me want to travel, to see Italy. See this freshness of produce, of these values, brought to life on my tastebuds. See the people who came up with this wonderful view of food and life. Eat with them, laugh with them. Then bring it all home and share it with those I love.

By the way, nothing gives a Chef a bigger boner than sharing his passion with someone who will bounce it back at him. Teaching someone how to make the perfect risotto, then sitting down with them, tasting it, talking about it. What was done right and what was done wrong. What other flavors could be added. But still enjoying the meal, fully enjoying it. Eating to taste, instead of eating to satisfy. That is a truly wonderful experience.

gah, I'm gonna go make something to eat. Something beautiful.

Kim-Chi

2006-07-06T12:43:00.000-05:00

Justin, Brendan, and Sean are downstairs making Kim-Chi

Kim Chi is a korean dish that is basically fermented cabbage. I don't get the appeal. Apparently the Canadian interns before us, (all asian) eat it by the bowlful, almost daily. Well......it's fermented cabbage....what more can I say. I tried it, smelled it. And it's fermented cabbage.................

I recently looked around on Autotrader.com about buying a used car. I saw one for 900$ Not bad, it should run fine. Especially if I'm not often gonna take it out of Cambridge.

We're still trying to furnish our house. Dressers, chairs, stuff like that. I think we're gonna hit up the salvation army pretty soon.

*yawn* and life goes on.

Waters Edge restuarant.

2006-07-01T19:12:00.000-05:00

So I started today at another restuarant in the culinary maze that is Hyatt. The Waters Edge Grill. The fine dining crown of the Hyatt Regency in Chesapeake Bay. The food is much much better than what I was making at docks. But it's still not the equivalent of West Coast Cuisine. (I think I've been spoiled up till now)

The most popular item (on my station, pantry) Is the Cobb Salad. Shredded Iceberg, Tomato, cucumber, red onion, blue cheese, crab, egg, avacado, smoked salmon bacon, and blue cheese dressing.

See now, this, this salad just sounds completly unappetising to me. First of all, Iceberg is the most flavorless of all the common lettuces. Why not use romaine? or a mesclun greens mix? or even spinach would be better than Iceberg.....stupid iceberg.

The menu for my station is not difficult either. There is no heat applied to anything, except for reheating already cooked chicken. Which isn't even done on my station. It's all chopping and assembly. Hardly a challenge. Until you factor in the mods (short for changes to the normal recipe)

If you've ever worked in a restuarant. Breakfast and lunch are the worst times for mods to menu items. Brunch is the worst. Eggs alone can be cooked a dozen different ways. And every bill will be slightly different. Rarely will someone order eggs exactly as they appear on the menu. (think of that the next time you're in a busy restaurant for breakfast, and you're ordering eggs.) If you order them straight as they are on the menu, you'll get them faster, and they'll probably be higher quality then if you added a bunch of modifications to it. Because that particular cook knows that one way to cook them VERY well.

In short, if you want the cook to put some love into his food, or at the very least, not hate what he's cooking. Don't mod your order. Avoid mods at all costs. It makes the cooks life easier. When it's easier, you get your food faster.

Anyways, Waters edge is still far preferable to Docks. For one the company is a lot better. For example. Lil (lilliana), Lil is one of the most cheerful funny people I've ever met. Everyone loves Lil. She's 43, and I thought she was late 20's at most. She's absolutly shameless, and says some things even I, shameless as I am, won't repeat here. (mostly because my mom reads this blog) But never in malice, always in good cheer. She's already adopted us all. "I'm gonna find you a nice girl Josh."

In short, Lil is awesome. I'll see if I can get a picture sometime. (Mom, you would love Lil)

anyways, I'm in a far better mood now that I'm doing some real cooking. Something with some challenge. (another restuarant to master, now that docks is done)

I'll run this hotel in 6 months.

w00t! Day off

2006-06-28T12:05:00.000-05:00

So I woke up this morning at around 10, 10:30ish. Then just sat in bed reading Alton Browns "I'm just here for More Food." It's all about baking and techniques for it. It goes into great great detail. Which is awesome. Alton Brown, he writes excellent excellent cookbooks. Highly recommended. If you like cooking, and want to cook very very well. Then read/study his books.

So today I'm gonna pay rent, maybe check my accounts and stuff. I think we're gonna try and go to Salisbury and try and get a Sam's Club membership. (it's like Costco, but run by Wal-Mart.)

ok, the pro's, prepare for a short list.

Because all the workers here are, lets say, ineffective. We look like absolute gods compared to the rest of them. The Chef's trust us with VIP function stuff. Which we do well, because we're all good cooks. So that's awesome, we have a chance to shine.

(another con, the executive chef doesn't like to promote interns! PIECE OF MONKEY CRAP!)

The cost of living down here is ridiculously cheap. We're living in a 4 bedroom house, double garage, air conditioning, nice neighbourhood, we're not too far from a school (which is of no importance to us, but would be attractive to families) and we're within walking distance of downtown Cambridge.

Even buying stuff like clothes and shoes are cheap. There are outlet malls at most an hour in any direction. I can get a laptop computer, a really good one, for like 1000$ And because we're splitting up the house between 6 people, bills are relatively cheap. Food isn't even that big of an issue, since Hyatt gives us free meals (we're only supposed to have one a day, but if you leave a little earlier you can get breakfast, and you finish work before 8 you can get dinner) the food isn't good, like everything else here, but it's free!

And, big bonus. I'm finally not living with my parents. So it's time to grow up and become an adult.

Also, Hyatt is a worldwide resort chain. Once I finish here, I'll get a really good recommendation from Mikey, and maybe go to another Hyatt, (A hyatt park, which is a step above regency) in Australia, or Italy, or wherever else I wanna travel to.

I am learning here, it's just not about food. It's more about people, how to teach them to cook, how to manage and supervise and encourage them. So it's not all bad.

It's mostly just a change of goals now.That stupid mike, he's such an asshole. I'm writing this cuz he's reading over my shoulder, stupid voyueristic pervert. Getting off on this are ya?

*Mike interlude* Oh god baby. Yes. Oh yes.

*Brendon's interlude* ummm.... i'm glad the lease has changed over.........

Anyways, those are the pro's. It's not horrible here, it's just different. But I'm gonna go now. later.

The Pro's and the Cons

2006-06-25T21:25:00.000-05:00

so I've been down here for a little over a month. And I think that's sufficient enough time to get a good analysis of the place where I've decided to dwell for a year and a half.

First off, the Con's.

Ugh, the food here SUCKS. Produce is poorer quality, (I had to look for almost 10 minutes to find an apple that wasn't bruised in the supermarket) Everything is just of a lower quality than it is in the West Coast. I think it's the attitude of the people here. They're all down south igotallthetimeintheworldandi'mnotgonnaworryaboutathing kinda attitude. While on the West Coast it's more of a Igotplacestogopeopletoseeandeverythingbetterbeperfectalongtheway kinda attitude. Which I think is more conducive to making better food and to the hospitality industry in general.
We have yet to find a good restaurant to eat. Everywhere we go, the food is salty, or overpriced, or loaded with msg, or just not very good to begin with. We end up cooking a lot at home. And even then it's still not the same. I'm afraid when I get home my tastebuds will be all messed up and nobody will hire me because I overcook everything, and add salt when it's already salted.
AGH! I HATE AMERICAN CHEESE! PROCESSED PIECE OF MONKEY GARBAGE! IT'S EVERYWHERE HERE! I GO THROUGH MORE AMERICAN CHEESE AT THE RESTAURANT THAN SWISS, CHEDDAR, AND PEPPERJACK COMBINED. It is infuriating to say the least. By the way, I don't think American cheese is ACTUALLY cheese. I'm not sure they use bacterial cultures to create it. It's more of a chemical cheese subsitute. Like squeeze e cheese, but with more chemicals.
The weather here is awful too, it can't make up it's mind. When I started walking to work this morning, it was overcast. 15 minutes later it was raining so hard it hurt my skin, then a couple minutes later it stopped. It went through this 4 times before I got to work! (it takes me an hour to walk) by the time I got to work I looked like I'd jumped in the river. All my clothes were soaking wet, even the shirt I kept in my backpack for the way home was soaked. I almost ruined my Classic Indian Cooking cookbook too! Then an hour after I'd started work, the sun came out! At least in B.C the weather stayed the same for a couple days at a time.
The people here DO NOT KNOW HOW TO COOK! I watched one of the Supervisors do a horrible job of peeling a canteloupe today. She had the right method, but the final result was a horrible hackjob! I can do better with a knife shorter than a pen lid! And yesterday Brenden was telling me about how his supervisor called him a racist comment right on the line (it's an open kitchen, there are people 5 feet away that can see everything.) Then, she turned her pockets inside out and said "Kiss the bunny on the nose!" (try it in the mirror, you'll get it) It's not so much that he was offended by this stuff, he probably gave as bad as he got. But she's a supervisor, and she's almost yelling racist and perverted jokes on the hot line. 5 feet away from the customers, how professional is that? Here's another one of her famous quotes. Me and the other canadian guys were quizing each other on food stuff. And Basmati comes up in a conversation, we were trying to find out where it comes from (the foothills of the himilayas) and she shouts out...."Basmati...that's a rice right!?"
I better get a raise pretty soon. I'm managing one of the outlets in every respect except for the job title and the pay. I'm working my butt off to make sure it doesn't go down in flames . And I'm getting paid less than the girl who doesn't know what goes into a guacomole. It's a downright piss off is what it is. It makes me wanna scream at all the cooks I'm training. And scream at all the servers (who don't know what they're doing either) And I don't like being an asshole. And that's what I'm turning into. If I'm gonna become this tyrannical asshole boss, I don't wanna cook anymore. I want to teach people, but I can't teach them if they won't listen! It drives me insane.
Now Erin is driving me crazy. Especially with the whole housework thing. Last night, after dinner. I watched her rinse her dishes and put them into the sink, right on top of my dishes. Later on that night, I did dishes, and Mike cleaned up the rest of the kitchen. She booted off upstairs to talk to people on msn and listen to Chris Rock comedy. Why is that everytime there is work to be done that would benefit the entire house, and not just her. She's off in her room, or going to bed early, or finding some other way to avoid the situation.
From the very beginning Erin has said she wanted to lay down some ground rules about housework and the splitting up of duties. But now that she has a chance, she's avoiding it. I told her today I wanted to talk to her about it when I got home. I've been home for 5 hours, and she's been "sleeping" the entire time. So what did I do while I waited for her to wake up? I de-boned the chicken we bought the other day, and started up a chicken stock. Then I cleaned up the entire kitchen....again. Then I figured out how we're all going to be paying for rent, electricity, and how much Sean and Bradley will owe us when they get down here. (the 29th) Then I came up here and started blogging. (which is turning out a lot longer than I thought) I forget where I was going with that, but GAH! she's getting on my nerves. I don't think I even can talk to her right now without calling her awful names and screaming.

I was going to talk about some of the Pro's of being here. But I'm too pissed off right now.

Bleh!

2006-06-23T22:28:00.000-05:00

So......I'm already tired of the restaurant that I'm working in.

I'm managing it in every aspect except for the title and the pay. Half of my employees are Polish interns, and while hardworking, speak hardly any English, and have fewer skills. My best worker, Nesse (nee-see) is taking a Hospitality Management College course. While it does teach some cooking basics. It's more focused on actual management. (most of which is useless in a real professional kitchen anyways) So she can cook, kinda. And she can manage....kinda. But she's better than everyone else.

Today I just kinda let her run the line (the area where all the food that is being served is prepped) While I sat in the back of the kitchen, did prep work, and just supervised. I was really not into the whole taking charge and making sure things get done right mood today. I just wanted to do the work, and make sure we were ready for July 4th (busiest day, and probably weekend, of the year)

After the 4th, I get to start at the fine dining restaurant. Breakfast and Lunch, pantry station. It's still not challenging work. But at least I'll be able to make quality food. Me and Mike will be able to double team the lunch specials and stuff, so maybe we'll be able to make some REALLY nice food. And Chef Shean, the restaurant chef, has no qualms about putting good stuff on the menu, regardless of who it comes from.

We went for Sushi the other night.......B.C Sushi is SO much better. It's cheaper, fresher, and tastes better. Don't eat East Coast sushi. At least not if you've had West Coast sushi. Night and day, Night. And. Day!

I miss home.

OH woe is me!

2006-06-20T18:53:00.000-05:00

So now I'm the one responsible for the house. The lease is now under my name. And I'm in it for 18 months. So if everyone decides to move out, and leave me on my own. I'm gonna have to pay 1500$ a month rent. That's quite a bit, even split among 4 people. (it'll be better once Sean and Bradley get down here though) Plus utilities and stuff. I'm worried that everybody will get sick of each other and want to move out. Then it'll turn into "well, I'll stay if blahblahblah moves out." And everything will go to hell here.

Brenden is already considering jetting of to Toronto. He says he's not learning enough here. And I can understand that. The food here is not the quality it was in Vancouver. And he had some really good job opportunities there. He used to manage his Dads greasy spoon restaurant. I'm not surprised he's not feeling challenged.

Mike and Erin have been pissing me off lately. They both haven't really grown up at all. Erin still never does any housework. She says she's done dishes, but none of us have ever seen her do them. Or any evidence of that. And Mike doesn't respect other peoples stuff. Brenden is pissed off at him, because he said he overheard Mike say that "Sharing the car with Brenden is hard enough." Sharing? excuse me? Are you paying the bills? Is the insurance in your name? Do you pay for gas? (this is what Brenden was saying) He wants all the privileges, and none of the responsibility.

I think I'm gonna get a car on my own. Me and Mike were thinking about going in together, but I'm reconsidering. I don't wanna have to share with him. I saw a truck by the highway the other day, 500$. I'm thinking about it. I know trucks are expensive to fuel, and insurance will be a bitch because I'm under 25. But at least they have competitive insurance companies down here. So I can at least shop around. And I don't drive a long distance to work either. I can walk there in an hour, and it's only like a 5 minute drive. Plus when I was driving the bosses Ford Bronco, man that thing was fun. I like driving trucks. You feel invincible on the road. Not to mention it would be handy to have a truck. (sorry dad, I know you always liked having a truck)

I've only been here for 3 weeks, and I have 1100$ american saved up. Bills will probably eat up about 500$ of that. That leaves me with 600$ to do with whatever I want. (I'll probably just save it for a rainy day) and Hurray for 3 paydays in June!

Alrighty, we're heading off to Hardee's for dinner. Tata for now.

happenings and going ons

2006-06-19T22:26:00.000-05:00

so I've been here for 3 weeks now. So far I've transformed my restuarant into something a little more organized (the food still sucks though) Trained two new Polish interns, (they're already at least the equivalent of people who've been working there a year) a managed to navigate my kitchen brigade through the insaneness of a rush all by my lonesome.

I have only one word....Booyah.

My next item on the list of conquests is the fine dining restaurant, pantry section.

So home life has actually been pretty steady all things said and done. There are a few blips on the radar. (cougherindoesn'tdoanyhouseworkcough) Brenden bringing home one of the servers from the restaurant. Mike buying a bike, breaking it, fixing it, breaking it again. Brenden wants to sign the lease on the house over to my name in case he decides to split. We have both our names on the insurance. Little things like that that are dealt with quickly.

I'm starting to settle into a routine. Wake up, shower, brush teeth, walk to work, get there early, eat breakfast. Do my thing there, try and do some extra work and get extra hours. Go home, read, maybe play videogames, shower again, go to bed late. If the weather is nice me and Mike and Brenden will sit out on the roof and drink beer. (Mom is going to freak out when she reads this)

It's kinda cool, we have an open door policy, anyone we know is free to come here, hang out. Talk with us, or even just stay here and play videogames (as Justin is wont to do) I like that. I like that people feel welcome at our house, and even more importantly, they like us enough to want to hang out.

While I'm on the topic of the people here. I was pleasently surprised. Everyone has been extremely friendly. They've been helpful, kind, polite (in their own way) and very friendly. We got a leather couch, 2 lazyboys, an armchair, a bookshelf, 4 tv tables, a footrest, an etage (whatever that was) a dining room table. all for 320$! And they threw in a whole bunch of pots and pans for the hell of it! It was awesome!

I'm starting to get comfortable here....homesickness hasn't set in yet. Hopefully this place will become a home before it can hit me too hard. At the very least I can always phone up my family, or talk to people on msn. That'll help stave it off. At least for a while. I still feel like I'm gonna snap at work, and lose it on some poor server. Or breakdown and cry in the fridge. But I'll tackle that bridge when I come to it. (How exactly does one tackle a bridge?)

till the next entry then.

The first day

2006-06-16T21:28:00.000-05:00

Ugh......

There is a name for the type of food I'm making...it's called Burn n'turn. Burgers, chicken burgers, kids fingers, crabcake sandwiches, chicken ceasar salads....etc etc. This is not challenging haute cuisine right here. As my trainer Jason put it "this is a glorified McDonalds."

Ugh, a year of culinary school for this (smacks self in forehead) Why didn't I stay at Ramada? Where beautiful food is the least that is expected of you. I never knew it was so difficult to make something tasty.

Then I worked Memorial day.

If you've ever worked in a restuarant you know the busy period is called "The Rush" or "You're in the Juice." (I'm toning it down a bit, chef's are known for colorful language) Well, normally, they last about 2, 2 and a half hours. THIS WAS 4 AND A HALF HOURS! 4 and a half hours of a bills list (order list) never less than 30 tables. Even for a 5 minute to cook burger, that's a hell of a long time to wait! At the end of the day we'd served over 750 covers. And the next day we did even more! What a way to start a new job.

So there is some challenge to it, I'll come out more organized and a lot faster than I was before. I'm pretty much in charge there, the only one there on weekdays is me, I'm responsible for all the ordering, all the prep, and making all the food. It's all self motivated, nobody checks in on me. So if I get in the juice, it's my own fault. But it's also kinda rewarding when you're booting out bills like nobodies business, and the chef comes to you the next day and says "You did all that and you didn't have to call for help on the line?"

It's not glamorous, but when it gets busy, the executive sous chef and the executive chef are right there on the line with me, slinging burgers. I guess it's a part of the industry and you'll never get past it. So I'll learn what I can, and countdown to the day when I get to move to the fine dining restaurant (July 4th! YAY)

well, this ended up not being so much about the first day as work in general. oh well. it's still a damn fine read ain't it?

The Road Trip

2006-06-13T18:43:00.000-05:00

After much deliberation. I decided I would move to Cambridge Maryland to work for a Hyatt Regency resort there. The job was made available through an internship offer made to foriegn students. As one of my main goals is to travel, I decided to take the oppurtunity because it would give me a foot in the door with the Hyatt Hotel chain, which is global in span. And to move away from home for the first time. This was perfect for me.

We left May 19th. It was the beginning of 4 nights 5 days of mind numbing monotony.

Our first day, we went to the Sumas border crossing. There we got our passports stamped with a J-1 visa stamp. Meaning we were aliens allowed to work in the U.S. From there we navigated our way onto Interstate 90 going east. Going through the outskirts of Seattle. Our first day was pretty uneventful.

Then we hit Montana, the vast endless plains of nothingness (almost worse than saskatchewan) We stopped on the second day, and ate a a Famous Daves Pit BBQ restuarant. While eating, it started to rain, and rain....and rain and rain and rain. We're talking the size of golf balls size rain.

So we're sitting inside eating our better than average bbq dinners. Enjoying the comfortableness of the inside of the restuarant and being glad we weren't out in the rain. When Brenden (one of my fellow canadian interns) comes out of the restrooms, looks at Mike (the other canadian intern we travelled with) and says "We left the sunroof open!"

Brenden tosses the car keys to Mike, who is closer to the exit. Mike makes a one handed grab for the keys while leaping over our table. He sprints for the door, dodging waitresses with drink trays, elderly couples, and a baby carriage. He dashes through the crashing rain, narrowly missing getting hit by a bolt of lightning, with several cars exploding in the background from the mere force of the rain. He dives in through the sunroof and starts the car, closing the sunroof just in time to avoid a deer flying through the air.

ok, so maybe it wasn't that exciting, but I gotta jazz it up somehow.

So Brendan and Mike got to sit in puddles in the front seat for the rest of the day. While I stayed relatively dry in the back. mwahahahahahahahaha

Thus ended the day of day two, and began the night of day two.

All during the trip through washington state and Idaho state. We'd been seeing flashing lightning off in the distance. Well now...we caught up to the storm. I have never seen such frequent and intense lightning in my entire life. If you live on the prairies and you've seen a thunderstorm there. That's nothing compared to this. Every few seconds the sky was lit up and all of us were blinking from blindness. Once or twice the lightning struck the road just a few miles ahead of us. (or at least it looked that way) Mike tried to take a picture of a bolt of lightning, and they were so frequent he'd try to take a picture of one, and the camera would lag just enough for him to almost get the second one. I doubt I'll ever see another storm like it.

After stopping for the night of the second day, we began our morning of the third day.

Good news and bad news. Good news, it's sunny out and the weather is nice. Bad News...we're still in Montana, and heading into Wyoming.....another Saskatchewanesque (say that ten times fast) type of place. Full of nothing. Then...more bad news! the storm that had passed us by during the night, we caught up to again! and it was the second night all over again!

I think it was around this time that Mike and Brenden decided that one or two No-doses would be a good idea to get us farther today than we had been travelling in previous days. And since I was there, they decided I had to take one too....even though I was just sitting in the back of the car trying not to fall asleep. Well....I didn't have to try to fall asleep anymore. And I don't think Brendan or Mike blinked once for 3 hours. We managed to cover 1300 km that day. Woohoo!

On the 4th day we went through the most roadkilly stretch of highway yet, I lost count of how many dismembered, bashed, and eviscerated deer we passed on that day, but it's safe to say it was probably in the 40's or 50's.

Going through Chicago was fun too, we stopped at a Small gas station just off the highway, where the teller was behind bars, it was pump before you pay, and everyone was giving us dirty looks. (Probably cuz we still had a British Columbia license plate) Needless to say we drove as far as we could from that place. ( I think till 1 or 2 in the morning) Then it was only one more day till Cambridge.

Our last day was uneventful, we arrived at the hotel at around 3 in the afternoon. Where the executive sous chef (Micheal Wilks) met us, gave us a tour of the hotel, then took us to his house, were we had a excellent dinner prepared by his girlfriend gabby, who is a chatterbox by the way.

The next day, after crashing at Mikeys, we started work. And thus began our career at Hyatt.

My first day is the subject of another blog.

Culinary School

2006-06-13T18:26:00.000-05:00

I started Culinary school at Vancouver Community College on March 29th, 2005. My teacher for the first 3 days was John Carlo Felicella. Now (and then) manager of Culinary Team Canada. He was excellent, even though we only had 3 days of him, he managed to show me a passion and dedication to food that was rivalled only by my highschool chef. (John carlo actually was Garde Mange for my highschool chef when he was working at the fairmont. ) After that Chef Glen O'Flaherty took over our class. He was to this day one of the best chefs I've ever worked under. Everything he said about food just reverberated through me. If I could have stolen his brain and melted it into mine, absorbing all his knowledge, I would have.

The rest of culinary school passed by in a blur. It was the best time cooking I've had so far. I made many connections, made a lot of friends (two of whom I'm living with right now in Maryland) It's too much stuff to cram into one blog entry. I'll probably make numerous references to it in future blogs. At which point I'll explain whats going on. That's enough for now, onto the next chapter!

In the beginning

2006-06-13T17:55:00.000-05:00

In the beginning there was school, and from school there were contacts made, and paperwork was done, and eventually an agreement was made. I would move to Cambridge Maryland (USA) for 18 months, and work at the Hyatt Regency hotel there. If you're visiting this blog for the first time, and reading my first post, to get an idea of who I am. Then here goes.
My Name is Joshua @#%*^& (I'm not putting out my last name on the internet!) I'm a culinary arts graduate. Food is my passion, food is my life. I live to cook, and to make other people happy by stuffing the most beautiful food they've ever had in their lives down their throat. I'm a glutton for punishment. I'd rather break my own back then let anybody else do any work for me. If for any reason someone does a favor for me, it becomes a personal debt I must pay back. Other than that, I like to be silly and goofy, sing songs and whistle in the kitchen, and experiment with flavors I've never tried before (coconut glazed beets anybody?) I'm pretty easygoing, but I take my work seriously.
Anyways, I started cooking in Highschool. I was lucky enough to have a cafeteria program that offered Chef's training. The instructor was the former executive chef of the Fairmont Hotel in Vancouver. Very passionate and talented instructor. As one of his apprentices said (who later taught me at culinary school) "Everything he touches turns to gold." He was largely responsible for getting me passionate about cooking.

I can still remember the moment I decided I want to become a chef for a living. I was volunteering at a banquet for the highschool. I was standing there cutting onions, and my back was sore, and my eyes were stinging. I'd cut myself earlier so my hands were sore. But I was having fun, I was getting along with everyone, we were making some beautiful food. And I was having fun. So I realized...."if I have to do one thing for the rest of my life, it might as well be something I enjoy." So I threw myself wholeheartedly into everything cooking. I told my chef. "teach me to be a good chef." And he pushed me to better, and it wasn't until I got to culinary school did I realize just how much of a head start I got over everyone else.

Once I graduated Highschool, I worked for a brief while at a local
cafe with another extremely talented chef. That was one of the best summers of my life. I've yet to work in another such beautiful place. I was right in the middle of a park. Making simple but high quality food. It was gorgeous. From there he got me a job at a hotel about 20 minutes drive away.

Once I started at the hotel, I realized just how fucking little I knew about cooking. I was in way over my head. Luckily I had a tiny little east indian chef named Elvis....awesome guy. He pushed me and pushed me and believed in me. It took me 3 months, but I finally got the hang of things. And I was starting to cook real professional food.

I cannot tell you how awesome this hotel was. The management was excellent, the employees were excellent. Everyone was so passionate about making beautiful food and making people happy. I couldn't think of a more beautiful place to start off my professional cooking career.

After about 6 months of cooking at the hotel, and improving upon my skills more than I ever knew. I started Culinary school at Vancouver Community College. And thus began the next chapter of my career.